Do They Know...

Ready for it or not, the holiday season is upon us. I see many people celebrating with lights, trees, and gifts. I can’t help but think of those who do without; these are the people that live in the third world, or the people just around the corner. These people are forgotten, and it is this time of the year where we need to take the time… and, regardless of the economy, anything we can spare and share what we do have. Many of us go our lives and we take for granted what we have, and we never take the time to remember those that stand in the shadows.

About the Photo: This is my friend Jessica’s Christmas tree, it is blue and silver… my favorite colors on a tree. The Holiday season is full of beauty and I would hope good cheer, no matter the Holiday you happen to celebrate!

Some notable charities:
www.toysfortots.org
www.AdoptaKatrinaFamily.org
www.goodsamjc.org
www.stewpot.org
http://carams.org/

look Again

Things can be viewed from many different points of reference, and you may think you really see something, but in reality you are not even seeing a third of what it really is. The trick is to see from all aspects, that is something that I wonder is even possible. Our species is capable of so much, and yet so many of our people neglect to actually “see” they take what is there and they go with it. They do not allow it to grow, they do not mold it, and they simply accept it and move on. This is not what is always best; it causes stagnation and that is a downfall. Stagnation is never a good thing, it leads to acceptance, and eventually cession of growth… and growth is needed for survival. All of our achievements were done by someone taking a bold step to look at a problem from a new perspective, and in doing so we found the solution; for all we know the key to our deepest mysteries may be just as simple.

About the Photo: This graffiti adorns the back of an administration trailer in Brandon Park. Graffiti fascinates me, it is often an overlooked and scorned form of art, I think this one displays a message that can be truly taken to heart.

Anew

Sometimes when things seem to be going wrong,
And I feel like I am the only one.
Sometimes I feel the world is falling down,
And I feel I can not go forward.

And then I think of you.

I find myself trudging along,
Knowing that the battle will be won.
And I can finally see the dawn,
And I realize that I do not have cause to worry.

The world begins anew.

Alone

We live our lives seeking the comfort of others, hoping to find that other soul to compete us. I’m not sure what the total drive is to find this essence, the being that we feel is our other half. I myself have been on that mission since I was maybe 16 and started feeling that something was missing. I discovered that having someone that is there and you know intimately, both physically and emotionally, is a feeling that can not compare. However this other soul should be an essence that serves to enhance our being, not become something that eclipses our own essence. They should work together to achieve greatness within the world, hand in hand. I think we as a people search specifically for the feeling of intense love that we have in the beginning of our relationships, we forget that it will fade and you will be left with something that is even better, a love that will not fade. It is the intense love that will eventually fade, and if that is all the relationship has, it will fail. This is what I see happening all around me and it has happened in my own relationships as well… and I have been helpless to stop it. Now I can stand alone and look, and know the truth… and I can stand knowing that it does not take another being to complete me, but it would be nice to have someone to turn to.

(About the Photo: A Long figure in the sunset at Lakeshore Park on the Ross Barnett Reservoir, Mississippi.)

I Don't

I don’t know where I am going…
So I follow you.
I don’t trust my words…
So I let you speak.
I don’t trust my feelings…
So I seek your guidance.
I don’t trust my rhythm…
So I let you lead.
I don’t know why it’s dark…
So I let you be my light.
I don’t know how to go on…
So I let you carry me.
I don’t know how to understand…
So I let you teach.
I don’t know who to trust…
So I turn to you.
I don’t know who to love…
So I love you.
I don’t know who to thank…
So I thank you.

Photo: Brighton, UK March 2009 at night from the palace pier.

Something Is Different...

Something is different from all the others, something doesn’t belong. The more you look and the more you see, the more pronounced the differences become. Keep looking, look closer, and see if you can spot it… when you discover you may very well be shocked….

The thing that doesn’t belong…

Is me.

Finding Yourself

You never expect to play a part, to fall so deep into a role that you lose yourself so completely that you are shocked when you finally recognize yourself in the mirror. As we sit going through the things that we forgot, things that are now so foreign… and yet they are a part of ourselves. And then there are times when you finally realize how unique you really are, and how the beauty slipped through your fingers… and the stars fall from the sky like shimmers of glitter into a sea of black… and you are left with the impression of fleeting loss… and it is hard to explain, and you feel so alone, and it takes a magical moment for the stars to reappear. It is when you can finally see things the way they are, that you can finally feel whole again, finally comfortable in your own skin.

About the Image: A Carolina Anole common to Mississippi is known for its chameleon like camouflage to disappear from predators.

Home

Through our lives we will call many places “home,” but consistently we forget what home is. I’ve found myself looking for home recently, and I have yet to find what makes me feel at home. There are many places that I once felt was home, but they are all in the past… presently I am lost… not sure where to turn…

About the Image: Although I have lost the feeling of “home” my home state is Mississippi, it is a beautiful place in many ways… this Cyprus swamp is on the walking trail to Mays Lake at Lefleur’s Bluff State Park in Jackson, Mississippi.

The Tide

I had the world at my fingers, and it slipped away… I watched it shatter at my feet broken and distorted. I was lost, not sure what to do, everything lay at my feet… all that I worked for, all that was to be, lost in one moment.

Then, something happened. I am not sure when, but I was handed another reality… one that I have trouble comprehending, one where everything is the opposite than it once was. Before I did not have control, I had no say in everything that once transpired… that has changed… now I am rebuilding something, I see a light. Just one problem….

Is it what I really want?

I think so.

Yes, I do.

(This was a rainbow that appeared over Flowood, Mississippi on 12-July-2009 at the Dogwood shopping center. It was unique in that it was not raining that day, just a few clouds, and yet the rainbow was the brightest I have seen in a long while.)

Perseverance

Dark clouds tend to gather at times when they are not needed, and they threaten to ruin every chance for sun possible. But the sun is triumphant, returning even after the darkest days, providing light and warmth… just when you thought you would never see it again.

We often forget that things will soon be better, especially in our darkest moments when we are blinded by self-pity. When the clouds do part and we do finally receive warmth and light, we often do not know how we allowed ourselves sink so deep into the darkness of despair. I am personally very guilty of this very thing, and in my darkest moments, it is very hard to remind yourself that it will get better… and perseverance does not always seem like an option. However even the largest deserts have an end, and the gifts of the journey make it worth it in the long run.

(Photo: Crossgates Lake in Brandon, Mississippi.)

Dreams

Dreams start out as small streams flowing through our lives, and as we go forward… they grow. Soon our dreams are so big, that they overflow their original banks and spill over into every aspect of our lives.

Suddenly we are faced with a question, what do we do with this?

The answer is simple, and often over looked. Jump in feet first, and let it surround you... you never really know what is possible.

(About the photo: The Mississippi River in Vicksburg, Mississippi at Sunset.)

Lost

Often we forget about things that once meant something to us, and we leave it where time can ravage it and take it for its own. It is not done for any reason; it just happens… we tend to cast things aside until we realize that it’s still there. The problem with this, is the fact that when we usually realize what we had, it is too late to save it.

The trick is, to hold on to it as long as you can… and cherish it… before you lose it.

Moments...

Life is full of moments; they are the things that actually make life so wonderful. There is just one problem about the moments, they are fleeting. Before we have a chance, to really take the moment in, it is gone and all that is left is a memory… a memory that will forever be cherished.

A Light...

When life gets dark and things seem like you are forever trapped in the darkness that life throws at you. Just when you are about to give up and allow the waves to smash you upon the rocks… Just when you need it most. A light. The light will guide you from the darkness, back into the beautiful reality that is life.

The light is different for every situation and for each person, it is what brings comfort and lets you know that no matter what… things will soon right themselves.

(The photo is one of Mississippi’s most famous landmarks, The Biloxi lighthouse. Built in 1848 it has survived the civil war, and numerous destructive hurricanes including Camille and Katrina. It is currently displayed on the Mississippi automobile tags.)

Phoenix

Things change through our life, things that we do not necessarily want to change. Change usually comes in a violent abusive manner, sometimes it comes as a breeze on a summer day. No matter how it comes, it usually is met with opposition, but it will always persevere and we will adapt to the new environment we are forced into.

(This is a view of the Biloxi-Gulfport area; it was nearly completely destroyed in 2005 by Hurricane Katrina… most of what you see here are the people of Mississippi raising like a phoenix from the debris that Katrina left in her wake.)

Things Lost... Returned!

Things done as a child can linger as memories for the rest of your life, and sometimes doing those things can make feelings long dead come back. I’ve managed to bring many of these feelings back to life when I rediscovered things from my youth… things like fishing. I’ve even had a chance to share these memories and feelings with friends and loved ones, and introduced some of these to a new generation creating new memories.

This is life, not that washed down version we get on a daily basis when we do what we always do… this is really living: experience, love, memories.

About the photo: Crystal Lake in Flowood, Mississippi. Created when the Pearl River was straightened during the construction of the Ross Barnett Reservoir. This former river channel is no longer connected to the Pearl River and is maintained by several former river tributaries.

...

Randomly when you least expect it you find something that makes you breathless. I don’t know why this happens, but it does happen. Three years ago I lost a friend in a car accident, I had to go to her myspace today for something… it had defaulted to the original… I found this http://www.gabawordsjots.blogspot.com/ it would have been hidden behind the background she used to have. I am in a bit of shock at this discovery, a glimpse at a friend that I cared for. I know that death is not an ending, and I know she still lives in each and very life she touched, I caught a glimpse of her tonight.

The Fool

Many times through our lives we start anew, at these times we are naive and many consider us foolish. The fact is that in these instances, we are brave and facing uncertainty, and we may even consider ourselves foolish. When we forge ahead and make our own path and everyone looks at what we have done in shock, at that exact moment we realize that playing the fool is not as bad as it seems.

Never be afraid to take the path unbeaten, go against the grain… this is your life, make the most of it, there is no shame in that.

(About the Photo: One of the many Shakespeare memorials in Stratford-Upon-Avon)

Lucky

When I was a child the world was so big and untouchable, and now as I grow older I have done more than I ever imagined I ever would… I have become someone that I never dreamed I would have become. I am overcoming the obstacles that have stood in my way most of my life, and I see that you can really touch the world. And I have just begun.

I am so very lucky to have such a diverse group of friends that help me grow and achieve my full potential. I could never be who I am without these people, and I know that. I am also very lucky to have a love in my life that compares to none, and I know that we will continue to grow and our relationship will conquer all that comes our way.

I never imagined as a child the things that I would have the chance to do, or the people that would touch my life, or allow me to touch theirs. I never imagined... and now I realize as every day passes how lucky I really am, to be me.


(About the Photos: Ice over Canada, the United Kingdom from the air.)

Dreams

Dreams are the things we cling to, we hold onto them for dear life hoping with all our being that we will not watch them shatter around us into the dust of a trillion stars. We never imagine that they will come true, but we relish the hope that they provide, and yet when the impossible becomes a reality… we are stunned. And then the dream becomes a building block, stronger than diamonds.

My oldest and seeming to me impossible dream: become a world traveler, leave my continent behind and see another. This dream has become a reality, and now the world has opened her arms and shown me that I can visit the places in my dreams.

Breathless

I’ve never met anyone that made me feel the way that you do,
These feelings have surprised me and made me realize.
The world has opened her arms and shown me something new,
Something that was already right in front of my eyes.
My heart has never loved quite like this,
It has never fully belonged to anyone until you.
The time that we are forced apart,
It is you that my heart does miss.
I feel we are counted among the few,
The lucky ones that are joined by the heart.
That is if not by our hands, or a kiss.

Sometimes love makes us cross bridges we never knew we were able to cross, sometimes it can drain oceans… and bridge hearts. It is one of the things that we never can fully understand, sometimes we think we have it… and then we are proven terribly wrong, or shown what it really is, usually when we least expect it.

Backyard Spring

Mississippi is one of the places that seasons make no real sense, we wear shorts one day… and the next night it snows. Right now we are in a very warm spring-like period, and all the plants are starting to bloom and all the insects are coming out to play. I do know that this early spring may very well be short lived, for I know that winter can strike back at any moment before the end of March and these delicate redbud blooms will be frozen sadly away, and the poor bumblebees will have to huddle for warmth. However for now they mingle, giving me a glimpse of what is coming.

On another note, this will most likely be my last blog post before my long awaited trip to the United Kingdom, where I will be sure to give the world a glimpse through my eyes of a completely different part of the world.

the Changing Face of Love

People come into your lives for many different reasons… and sometimes they have to leave. Some of these people create within us intense emotions; these people are immediately or at times over time placed on a pedestal. Love is definitely a complex emotion, and I personally believe that once we love someone, that we never truly stop loving them. I have been told by many different people with many different situations that I am wrong, but in each case I have been able to make my case and have them leave the conversation thinking… Love never ends, it only changes forms… now you may never want to see someone ever again, for whatever reason... but somewhere buried deep inside you is still a little bit of the love that once dominated the relationship. It never will cease to fully exist, it will always be there to remind you of what was once were, and what in most cases may never be again. The trick to this knowledge is accepting, and moving forward… there are more people for you to meet, and more people to place on a pedestal, someone will eventually prove themselves worthy of your love, and they will hopefully in turn place you on a pedestal… and send you love equally in turn.

Hearts United

I was once half a person, going through life looking… searching for something. Now that I have unexpectedly found my other half, I feel as if anything is possible. With you I can conquer oceans, and fly through the air. With you I can unite nations to bring our hearts together. Life is beautiful and I am ecstatic to share that beauty with you. Together we will see the planet, hand in hand we will stand on foreign shores, and marvel at the beauty that pales in comparison to you.

Cusp of Greatness

Today I am on the cusp… The cusp of something grand and wondrous… I am approaching an adventure that evokes emotions inside that I can not explain. I am very hopeful and excited about what could come of this adventure and of the unknown that lies on the other side of this. I am ready to cross into the unknown, and I am not frightened…

Multiplicity

Each one of us has many sides that we show depending on the situation. We like to think in our minds that we are always the same person, and yet we sometimes miss the reality that we are not. This is not a bad thing, this is usually self preservation at it’s finest…

Byram Swinging Bridge

Through my life there has been many times where I have realized that as we grow older we are replaced with something new and better. This is one of the most unfair realities of life, and it applies to landmarks and in many cases people. It pains me to see something forgotten and left to the ravages of time, especially when it still has so much to offer.

This photo is of the historic Swinging Bridge in Byram, Mississippi and its newer replacement. The Swinging Bridge was at one time the only crossing across the Pearl River at this location, until the 1980’s when there was an incident involving an 18-Wheeler that damaged the bridge beyond repair for vehicular traffic. However the bridge does bring back memories for many people who remember riding across it and feeling the entire bridge sway beneath them, in fact an adult walking across it can make the bridge move. The bridge itself is unique as in that it was built during the Second World War by German POW’s located at one of the POW camps in the state. It is the only example of a suspension bridge to my knowledge in the state of Mississippi, and if the state/ any government agency were smart they would preserve this historic landmark and repair it to the degree that perhaps a park overlooking the river could be built and the bridge could be enjoyed for many generations to come.

Australia

Australia my heart goes out to you,
And to those that have to begin anew.
My heart aches for those in pain,
As they search through the embers in vain.
The horrors the fair nation is enduring,
The people that are now in mourning.
Australia the fair nation is burning,
Australia for you our tears are falling.
The people of Australia will endure,
Their hearts are strong and pure.
Australia will once again stand tall and fair,
A southern land beautiful and rare.

The land of the Southern Cross is on fire… the natural disaster that the fair nation is enduring of strife and terror. My own Mississippi has suffered similar disasters, entire towns were destroyed by Katrina, and many lives were lost. From this experience, I know that in these trying times the nation will come together and endure. My heart goes out to all of the people of Australia as they endure the hell that they are now facing.

History

History has a way of bubbling up, and you find things from your past that you never expected to find. The beauty of these surprises can shock and amaze and you must embrace your past and incorporate this into which you are now.

About the photo: While taking some photos of the swinging bridge in Byram, Mississippi I came across these fossil beds under the bridge. Mississippi was once under water this has led to most of our fossils being of the marine variety.

Clean Slate

I open my eyes, the sunlight streaming through the window… the cool air against my skin making me huddle under my blankets a few minutes more. The sounds from the house reverberating through my ears, my thoughts drift… my thoughts always drift. A feeling overcomes me as I realize that I have awoken to yet another day, one that is new and full of promise. I never know what the day will eventually bring, but I do know that each day starts with the same potential to be better than the last, that is one gift we are all blessed with, a chance to start over every few hours… we just have to take that chance and challenge.

24

Light shines through the old window,
Illuminating the entire room.
Shadows move in the golden light,
As the sun moves along it’s daily course.

The sound of a passing crow,
Echo’s throughout the silent room.
The Sun moves further toward Night,
Faster than a galloping horse.

The Moon will soon come to play,
As the night birds will sing their tune.
Moonshine will replace the sun’s glow,
As the night breeze steals the warmth of day.

The cool air moves my way,
As my world grows as silent as a tomb.
Tired my eyes will grow,
As to dreams my thoughts will sway.

My mind drifts into another realm,
Of fright and fantasy, for at least the night.
Colors flash through this world,
But all to short it does last.

But soon consciousness takes the helm,
As once again the world turns bright.
A New day the world does move toward,
One unlike any past.

About the Photo: This photo was taken at Spirit Hill Pond in Pearl, Mississippi… I was experimenting with my new camera!

Chaos

Life is naturally chaotic, but that is the appeal… there is nothing more fun that enjoying life at its best. I’m not saying I enjoy “Drama” or anything of the sort, I am simply stating that not all chaos is bad, and if you look at it for what it really is, it is quite a beautiful thing.

This piece of art hangs in my bedroom, the title is Sunrise over Beekman Place, it was originally done as a set piece for Mame (Black Rose Theatre 2008). I felt that I had put a piece of me into this, and I loved it, so after the run of the show, it made it’s way home with me and now adorns my bedroom…

Standing Tall

Throughout life we have to do things that we do not always want to do, but we must stop and remember the reasons why we do these things. Are they for the right reasons? I know that when we face some obstacles we tend to want to run, but we have to think about the others in our lives, and we have to stand up for those that are not able to run… we have to speak for the ones that are unable to speak for themselves. We have to look that fear dead in the eyes and go into it full blast to protect the ones we love… no matter what.

American Hope

For the past eight years the country of my birth has been in the deep darkness of a regime that has been unpopular and detrimental. The lies and hatred that the last eight years has spread throughout the nation like a cancer, and it has even spread into other countries. It would be conceited of me to think that America has a direct impact on every country, but I do know that every country impacts one another, we are all in this together… what happens to the U.S. will have a ripple affect, just as if what happens to France, Australia, India, Britain, etc will also have an equal effect on the rest of the world. Today History was made in my country, and our country is filled with hope for President Obama… a hope for change… a hope that he can lead us out of the darkness and into the light. I sincerely wish him the best, and I hope that he can lead with nobility and honor that our country has been lacking…

“The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep... But, America, I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there.”

~President Barack Obama

Mundane

When you look at something you never can quite see it, you must look beyond… look deep into it, only then do you see what it truly is. Most often as we go through our daily lives we glance at things but we never look, we never see the beauty that is inherit in the mundane, that is the downfall of the routine.

This is the main breakroom at my place of work… we have two smaller ones, but this is the larger one with all the goodies. I thought this shot was interesting, and I was the only one in the room at the time, and It just struck me as a beautiful moment.

All You Need....

Love is one of those emotions that defy all logic, it constantly provides you with surprises and supreme joy as you continue your journey to your destiny. I’m not necessarily talking about romantic love, love comes in many different forms… it could be the love from a friend or the love from a family member… Love helps us move forward, it gives us hope, and sometimes it seems that when we are running low, someone unexpected comes along and shows us that perhaps there is a little more than we expected.

“All you need is Love”~ John Lennon

About the Photo: This Statue was outside the front entrance to Northpark Mall in Ridgeland, Mississippi… I’ve been there a million times and never notice it, kinda shocked me.

Best Mate!

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A friend once told me that once a mate, a mate forever. I believe that whole heartedly, friends are a rare commodity, and should be honored and cherished. I am very lucky for the friends that I do have in my life, and I know that friends do come into your life, and they do occasionally drift out… but they will always remain in your heart.

This same friend painted this Aboriginal art, it signifies her home country of Australia…

Do it...

The world is full of unknown adventures waiting to be had, and I am just waiting to get out and have them. Time for my first adventure is approaching fast, and I can hardly contain the excitement… Someday, I hope that people look back and say that they wish they could have seen just a few of the places that I have seen, and perhaps they will actually do it. I do not seek to inspire envy, because there is no reason why life can not be lived, it is meant to be lived. Most people look at life as going through each day as a task… I wake up and go to work, and that is it… No, there is a whole world out there, and if you do not at least try to see it and touch it… there is no point. Me, I want to touch it… and I think I will.

"Do it Now… There is only Now, Right Now” – George Balanchine

Photo: This is my friend Rand’s refrigerator, she has been many places and seen many things… I admire that quality in anyone…